Eighteen and I don't know what I want

by Rachel Lynch in

Above is a photo from my birthday taken on a film camera. My father and I usually use film to track all of our adventures and travels because we enjoy taking film to go get developed.

Today I finished reading Henry Miller’s Tropic of Cancer. Here is a quote from the end of the book that I think really embraces my new views and grown-up artistic sensibility.

“Side by side with the human race there runs another race of beings, the inhuman ones, the race of artists who, guided by unknown impulses, take the lifeless mass of humanity and by the fever and ferment with which they imbue it turns this soggy dough into bread and the bread into wine and the wine into song. Out of the dead compost and the inert slag they bread a song that contaminates. I see this other race of individuals ransacking the universe, turning everything upside down, their feet always moving in blood and tears, their hands always empty, always clutching and grasping for the beyond, for the god out of reach: slaying everything within reach in order to quiet the monster that gnaws at their vitals. I see that when they tear their hair with the effort to comprehend, to seize this forever unattainable, I see that when they bellow like crazed beasts and rip and gore, I see that falls short of this frightening, spectacle, anything less shuddering. Less terrifying, less mad, less intoxicated, less contaminating, is not art. The rest is counterfeit. The rest is human. The rest belongs to life and the lifeless”

My Amazing Birthday Card from Marc --